how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
wonder if it's good or bad.
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
how did it come to this?
i do NOT wish to talk about my day.
i hope all gets better.
Speak Softly Love
Andy Williams
Speak softly love and hold me warm against your heart
I feel your words, the tender trembling moments start
We're in a world, our very own
Sharing a love that only few have ever know
*Wine coloured days warmed by the sun
Deep velvet nights when we are one
Speak softly love so no one hears us but the sky
The vows of love we make will live unitil ew die
My life is yours and all because
You came into my world with love, so softly love
i have one thing to sae now:
weishan if you're reading this...thank you
for the pics(so you'd forget bout the damn camera thing..=x)
Good God, What a Night That Was
Good God, what a night that was,
The bed was so soft, and how we clung,
Burning together, lying this way and that,
Our uncontrollable passions
Flowing through our mouths.
If only I could die that way,
I’d say goodbye to the business of living
-- Petonius (1st Century AD)
Trans. Kenneth Rexroth
im back home!
went to jess's chalet yesterday. after a looong morning of red cross. the whole thang didn't start off well. my hair was sticking out in places. shaojin was late(again), and the supposed to arrive shuttle bus never appeared.but all was fine once we reached there. we were kinda the first peeps to be there(excluding jess's family members). anyways, food was aplenty. so was space. the whole buncha us were: mi, jac, fatz, xiaoying, boonxiang, gary, peili, shaojin, andy, wilson. den marie came along. she was wearing this dark purple bandana and looking a lil' bit funny(haha). fatz was singing, the rest were playin heart attack or old maid or both, and mi jac and mariez were merrily enjoying the food. haha. oh no..im such a freakin glutton.
was watching tv when qing and they guys came along. and then those darn girls had to embarrass me. time and again. oh manz, it aint funny anymore. i'll wonder if he doesn't jump and run away when i go near him. the guys were: elson, qing, small qing, derrick, wai hong, zhoo, frankly i cannot remember who else was there.
anyways we decided to go to the arcade after some time, meanwhile elson n co had left to god knows where. the arcade kinda sucked, coz there weren't much games. we kinda got hooked on the coin slotting machine however. it kinda works like the jackpot. we all invested and played as one. den peishi n gang came. wenlin, sally, mel, weishan, jo and ed was with her. plus ej? i guess so. took some photos(yea..in the arcade), then went back. ningzi was there. i tink chenxi, mingthiong arrived. seriously i really aint sure who actually came and who didnt. realised the absense of jieying and yeeleng, but decided against asking why. nick and kaihoe came. we were all gettin ready for the bbq. took more photos around the chalet. oh yeah, it was bout tat time yulun and chen lim came too. ate, talked, crapped. took more photos aft that. elson n co were playin bball. again. so we decided to go look for them. watched the normal guys play against the express ones. the court seemed extremely small. took more photos, then went back for the cake-cutting session. it was more photos. i hope i can get down to making the online photo album i've been talking about. photos again. oh yea, and we had booze, unlimited supply of booze..oooh. i just cant understand why sally and weishan seemed to be gorging themselves with the booze. mood? ah, i dont know. we just, shouldn't abuse the fact we had access to beer...you know?
went bowling aft that. was kinda irritated coz the gals said they wanted to play, then when we asked, they declined. man. they'd rather sit in the playground and talk to the guys, i guess. anyways we went. ed n jo booked the pool table and we kinda played. ej was being irritatin coz he was insisting we do things his way. like he plays real good pool. anyways i tink mel was kinda pissed at him. i guess all of us were kinda, too. went bowling wif ning, ming tiong and jo aft tat. small qing was realli realli funny and he's now officialy my encourager. hahaz. mt was a pro at bowling, as he does at golf and pool. oof. he plays all the high- class games well huh? oh, and erin came.
went back to the chalet to a period of downess. the 4 were hiding up in the room, playin murderer. so me n ning wandered around. we den settled down at the picnic table outside wif chenxi and mariez, feeling boredz. it was kinda sad. everybody who was supposed to leave went by that time.
time was then spent wif our legs in the air. bathed, den went out again. sent marie back. went out walking, den came back again. felt a lil' sad coz it was a nice night and nobody wanted to go see stars wif me(marieeee!!!!). went back and kinda lazed around. jac erin and xiaoying were asleep by then, fatz were struggling to stay awake, and we were all very bored. nick was noisy, jess n kaihoe was bein sweet and nice to each other, and qing, chenxi and some peeps were playin cards, the rest were watching wrestling.
decided on watching ghost ship. by then everybody was sleepy. nick continued to be noisy, wilson was struggling to sleep, peili was struggling to find a place to sleep, and weizhang was struggling to find a blanket. all of us were fighting for pillows. struggled to watch a horrible pirated versh of ghost ship(which i gave up after the second disc). weizhang finally settled on the sofa and shared a blanket wif me and ning. yulun slept on chairs, and chen lim was missing the whole night. slept here b dere. nick continued to be noisy, and we all watched mtv. sneaked upstairs in hope to find someplace to sleep in, but failed. waited till 4, then woke the gers up.
abit sadz this morn coz the guys went star and sun gazing near morn. to think i had been whining the whole night to watch stars, and i missed it. caught up with them only when the sun was halfway up. missed the chance to take beautiful photos of the sunrise. oh manz. went back and they started digging around for food. sang karoke(early in the morn?!), then went back home and slept all the way through till 5.
argh..my fingers hurt.
Childhood
Michael Jackson
Have you seen my Childhood?
I'm searching for the world that I come from
'Cause I've been looking around
In the lost and found of my heart...
No one understands me
They view it as such strange eccentricities...
'Cause I keep kidding around
Like a child, but pardon me...
People say I'm not okay
'Cause I love such elementary things...
It's been my fate to compensate,
for the Childhood
I've never known...
Have you seen my Childhood?
I'm searching for that wonder in my youth
Like pirates and adventurous dreams,
Of conquest and kings on the throne...
Before you judge me, try hard to love me,
Look within your heart then ask,
Have you seen my Childhood?
People say I'm strange that way
'Cause I love such elementary things,
It's been my fate to compensate,
for the Childhood I've never known...
Have you seen my Childhood?
I'm searching for that wonder in my youth
Like fantastical stories to share
The dreams I would dare, watch me fly...
Before you judge me, try hard to love me.
The painful youth I've had
Have you seen my Childhood....
i've realised that i haven't been thinking much lately. still do, but, brain activity seems to have mellowed out to a near minimum.
ahh...i have one thing official to say: the school computers suck. simply. just. sucks. oh man, i never knew typing to be such a chore. am only attempting this stunt because there's plenty of time to waste, and no place to waste it on. dont even have classroom to go back to. darn that mrs sim. today was an average day. school came, school went. pretty quickly too. drat house practice. hoong ta's not gonna be coming again, which means i'm gonna have to take charge. again. don't get me wrong, it's not the taking charge that's so cumbersome, it's the whole takin charge and not knowing what to do...
oh well.
shall come back later to update...i guess
haven't been updating for like..2 days? well , nothing much has happened anyway, soo i guess it doesn't matter. have been struggling with tests for the past few days...not struggling cause i can't manage the load..struggling to actually get myself down to studying. oh, such a chore. oh well, guess i hafta go back to struggling with my amaths for tomorrow. all i can see is a bleak gleam of light ahead. shall see what happens next.
monday actually passed by real fast. in fact,i dont even remember anything i did. it's like i never went to school. oh yeah and the damn armstrong made a sick xiaoying cry. such a loser.
tuesday went by pretty quickly too. started snowing as i went home. haha. no, actually the rain looked like it was snowing...so there. watched meet my folks..and thought the lie detector thing was kinda cool(not to mention the guys heh).
today...today was indulgence day. indulged myself with coffee with cost me near to 7 bucks. oh man, the things we do for coffee. went to thompson's starbucks. considering all the bad press starbuck's been getting, i'm pretty much liking it. so far at least. the couches are more comfy, and the coffee is..well, not to bad i guess. not better than coffee bean's of course. but still...
today went quite well considering my dislike for 2-people gatherings. guess i'm slowly overcoming my silly fear of that. did maths with fatz, then discovered that we didn't know how to do most questions( i guess i'd better start worryin huh?). and then there was maths.
argh..better study now.
Outside
Staind
And you
Bring me to my knees
Again
All the times
That I could beg you please
In vain
All the times
That I felt insecure
For you
But I leave
My burdens at the door
But I'm on the outside
And I'm looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
'Cause inside your ugly
Your ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you
All the times
That I felt like this won't end
Was for you
And I taste
What I could never have
It's from you
All the times
That I've tried
My intentions
Full of pride
But I waste
More time than anyone
But I'm on the outside
And I'm looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
'Cause inside your ugly
Your ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you
All the times
That I've cried
All this wasted
It's all inside
And I feel
All this pain
Stuffed it down
It's back again
And I lie
Here in bed
All alone
I can't mend
But I feel
Tomorrow wil be OK
But I'm on the outside
And I'm looking in
I can see through you
See your true colors
'Cause inside your ugly
Your ugly like me
I can see through you
See to the real you
found this while browsing. see if you could see the light.
for louis
i wander lost amongst the mortal toil
feeling my way through an eternity of grief
oh how i cling to my guilt ridden fears
and the sweet bitter joy i feel
when in my arms i take
the life from your veins.
a smile
a touch
a kiss so sweet
im one of the damned
on this palnet i am bound
for an eternity of loss and sorrow
till the next time i feast....
then comes again
the smile
the touch the kiss so sweet
-stephanie
argh.
todae's red cross sucked. to the core. the week sucked. everything sucks. oh man. i feel so picked on. everybody's picking on me. mrs "the-cat" ismail, mrs "look-at-me-im-organised-and-u-should-too" rama and now my stupid fuckin red cross teacher, ms "i-really-care-but-sorry-if-im-too-long-winded" goh. damn. blurbed some things in my blind fury that i regret now. hope she doesn't come knockin' round my door. everybody's picking on me and i feel so streched, and like bilbo would sae, like butter scraped over too much bread.
anyways, that aside, went over to jess' house after that wif js, xy, fatz and mel - together wif the guys...(boon xiang, andy, blah..). we all did homework in the midst of drifting around rooms looking for food(with the exeption of fatz - she was in the room the whole time and wouldnt come out till she finished her hw(erm..wierd?)). drifted out to watch the rest play a very hearty(not to mention noisy game of heart attack) after finishing the homework. then drifted down with fatz to wait for her folks. drifted back up and played on the com(with the funny mouse) for a while, then drifted away for dinner. yeah, the trip was pretty much just drifting around... played heart attack and watched a very disheartening soccer match bet arsenal and man utd..before going home. it was kinda funny cause both xiaoying and mel(both whom i went home with) were in such a hurry to get home - and i didn't realise why until we were almost out the door. i shouldaf hit miself on the head. oh man. both didn't want their respective "interests" to send them home. hah. oh manz. it got better cause they tried so hard, yet they got nowhere. hah. those guys were pesky. hahz.
the last two days flew by like one helluva strong wind. thursday was so not good a day for me, everything went wrong. geo sucked, got picked on by that mrs look-im-in-a-sack! ismail, got caught for my eyes, socks, ears, whatever. had a communications breakdown between me n my friends, was pissed the whole day round, and had to stay for a long afternoon of house practice, which sucked too. got home at about 6.30 which really left little time to do what i wanted to do for valentine's - cookies. figured since it was the last year we were gonna be together, and they always complain bout me being indifferent towards such occasions. anyways, the cookie making session sucked as well, stood for so many hours to painstakingly make the cookies with the icing on it. the cookies tasted soggy(some at least), but what was i to do? i had to wait for the cookies to dry. went to bed feeling sore and ex-tre-me-ly tired. dead tired. damn.
came to school feeling highly anticipated - today was valentine's day after all. received and gave presents away to peeps. i guess i will never ever get again how much i got today. haha. strangly, i didn't feel really, er, content? happy, yes. of course. extremely. super happy. so happy i could fly - but. guess single awareness day will be single-awareness day eh? or perhaps it was the stupid mrs rama and sim. fat bitches. oh yeah, and i feel a wee bit bad, cause jianxiong seemed a bit sad at what i got for him(he bought something kinda expensive..compared to mine).soo....
oh well.
hAppY vAleNtiNe's dAy!!!
ahh..been a busy little bee today. went bai nianing - all around amk. ate so much i'm gonna puke..dont think i'll think of food for a couple of days at least.
feel kinda worried cause there's homework to be done and presents to wrap. and i'm beginning to feel tired already. oh well..
didnt go to school today. forgot to wake up. oh well.
went to school for homework(i'm trying to be conscientious...k?). found out the girls were gonna go orchard. decided to tag along. was supposed to go to xinyin's while jess settled her guides matter, but i guess i got a lil bit irritated at their indecisiveness. went back home instead. it was so damn friggin hot i was sweating like a pig. the day got better aft that however. attacked the shops with one thing in mind: get prezzies for jess. i guess we all got sidetracked. pitied the guys(boon xiang, andy and wilson) a little, cause they aren't really suited to shopping. with us at least(haha).found out some pretty surprising(not) things bout andy. realised boon xiang is actually kinda gentlemanly(not tomention gentle too..=P). wilson was plain crappy, in a funny way. bought things for ed n jianxiong(finally!), so am pretty happy with miself. i guess the mocha frappachino i had at starbucks also helped. or the fact that we bitched bout people. had spaghetti for dinner(it was delicious by the way...). took some pics. kinda please cause i looked pretty, well decent, contary to the expectation. hope jess will remember bout the small itsy sticker, cause mi like it real much.
itz kinda sad, coz a few hours of walking around and 30 bucks' spent. whoa. and i thought i aint gonna spend much.
Contact Process
Sulphur is burnt in air to produce sulphur dioxide.
Sulphur + Oxygen -> Sulphur dioxide
S(s) + O2(g) -> SO2(g)
Sulphur dioxide is passed over vanadium(IV) oxide catalyst at 450 degrees to produce sulphur trioxide.
Su
Haber Process
Nitrogen and hydrogen are mixed together in the ration 1:3. Mixture is passed over catalyst.
Equation for the reatction producing ammonia is:
Nitrogen + Hydrogen <-> Ammonia
N2(g) + 3H2(g) <-> 2NH3(g) [H = -184kJ]
The higher the pressure, the greater the percentage of ammonia at equilibrium.
The higher the temperature, the smaller the percentage of ammonia at equilibrium.
Nitrogen and hydrogen gas is passed over a iron catalyst at optimum temperature of 450 degrees and pressure at 200 atmospheres. The reacted ammonia is condensed to form liquid ammonia, and the unreacted nitrogen and hydrogen will be passed over the catalyst again. Only 15% of the nitrogen and hydrogen react to produce ammonia.
Extraction of Iron
Iron ore, calcium carbonate and coke are fed to the top of the blast furnace. Hot air is fed to the bottom.
Coke reacts with oxygen to form carbon dioxide and a lot of heat(exothermic reaction)
Carbon + Oxygen -> Carbon dioxide + Heat
C + O2 -> CO2 + Heat
Carbon dioxide will react with more coke to form cabon monoxide a reducing agent
Carbon dioxide + Carbon -> Carbon monoxide
CO2 + C -> 2CO
Carbon monoxie will react with the iron(III) oxide to form molten iron ore, which flows down the furnace.
Iron(III) oxide + Carbon monoxide -> Iron + Carbon dioxide
Fe2O3 + 3CO -> 2Fe + 3CO2
Limestone is decomposed to form calcium oxide and carbon dioxide.
Calcium carbonate -> calcium oxide + carbon dioxide
CaCO3 -> CaO + CO2
Iron ore impurities(silicon dioxide) will react with calcium oxide to form slag. The slag runs off the bottome of the furnace. It floats in top of the molten iron.
Silicon dioxide + Cacium oxide -> Calcium silicate
SiO2 + CaO ->CaSiO3
am toking to an old friend online now. which has got me thinking - we aint what we used to be. probably because we've all somewhat grown up, perhaps cause we're all so busy now, but i guess itz cause itz been ages since i last saw her. she's a really good person and all, and i really like her, but i find that i can hardly remember what she looks like. and people do change, and i wonder how she looks like now. all that i can vaguely remember, are the times we used to have...mostly at her mom's shop. funny that we hit it off so well really. i have like, nothing in common with her. she lives soooo far away(back in the times...), and she studies in a strange school. hah. i guess opposites attract eh?
should try asking her out sometime eh?(she tried...but i was either unfree or not in the mood...so..)but im shy. oh well
ahhhh...
aching from the yogic exercises we did during pe. pe will now officially suck cause we've been grouped - me with jane and adeline . thank god for jieying. today was just ordinary day, school blah blah blah home. suffered from a brief period of depression sometime before recess to after. got a chocolate from ed later...i dunno..chocolate = mood lifter? that's what they sae....
am i just someone who appears stronger than what i really am?
daphne, you're a Shark!
Your personality is actually determined by two personality sub-types - your primary, or dominant sub-type, and your secondary sub-type. You are a Shark which means you are a Seeker / Success. Your primary sub-type is defined by "Seeker" characteristics and your secondary sub-type is defined by "Success" characteristics.
That means you've got a robust love of life and a killer instinct. Chances are you hate rules, and don't plan on getting old. You're flexible and friendly on top of being innovative and smart. In short, people respect you.
How do we know all this? How do we know you're extroverted and love being in the spotlight? Or that your mantra is "work hard, play hard"? How could we have divined that dull parties make you weep?
Because while you were taking the test, you answered four different types of questions — questions that measured confidence, apprehension, willingness to take risks, and your focus on experience versus appearance — the primary traits that determine your personality. Based on your responses, we determined your personality type, Shark.
And that's just scratching the surface.
my personality test from emode.com. hmmm...
my mom's cousin just came. their child( i guess..my distant cousin?) looks so much like a caucasian mixed kid. can almost be certain he'll be so handsome when he grows up. ah, betta get mi his number eh? just in case. hah
it was a busy day yesterday. went to school for red cross in the morning. waited 4 long hours for the morning to pass. rushed home(actually i didn't have to) to get ready to meet ed and guys at the mrt station at 2.30. i was early(again) even though i arrived at 2.45. what't the deal with me gettin earlier n earlier? itz like a curse. anyways, people started arriving after i started to worry, then i realised xingwen was already here for quite a while. apparently i didn't see him among the mass of people. so we got to elson's house finally. his house was packed. from door to door. didn't even have ample space for me to squat. finally found meself a space near the food(!!! ohmigoshimsuchaglutton). barely warmed the seat when the peeps suggested making for zhoo's house. so off i went. outside anyway. waited looooong for the other guys(that's the problem with crowds.) had fun playin with my blouse in the wind. and we finally made our way to zhoo's. same thang as before, tables were set up and we got ourselves busy real soon. played mahjong n cards and wasted the day away. found out that i look horribly like peishi(it's funny how one's opinions of someone change so easily).
the guys suggested going out to xiao xiong's for dinner. so we did. ended up with edmund..jianxiong and wenlin. we lagged behind a bit, coz of jianxiong's leg. talked abit to them. shamelessly requested(ok ok...demanded) them to give v-dae prezzies. actually i didnt demand..i just asked nicely. seriously! wenlin kept insisting on sunflowers(*rolls eyes*)..so i suggested they buy chrysanthemums instead. hah. xiaoxiong's was closed, so we went to the big market instead. had bakuteh with zhoo, his bro and wenlin. free. oh man.
went to cheng san with the guys. wanted to go home actually, but the night was really really beautiful and i wanted to go admire them. the stars went into hiding when i got there. the remainder of the night resulted in edmund losing my ring, then finding them near the road outside, me attempting to learn bball tricks, and playing a quick(and boring) match. went home with ivan and talked to him some bout stuff.
the whole trip left me happy but uncontented, all the way lamenting on my hair. oh well. at least some people(me excluded) thought it was nice.
todae was shopping day. got gifts for the guys for single awareness day. bought miself a headphone too. hopefully it'll sound good. bought miself a pencil case too(yay!).
pure
What's YOUR sexual fetish?
brought to you by Quizilla
thank god. haha
Disorder Rating Paranoid: High Schizoid: Low Schizotypal: Very High Antisocial: High Borderline: Very High Histrionic: High Narcissistic: High Avoidant: Moderate Dependent: Moderate Obsessive-Compulsive: Moderate
-- Click Here To Take The Test --
hah.
argh.
my hair looks like some kinda ball attached to strands of hair.
regret cutting my whole hair now.
damn.
Mama
mama are you not fine?
mama do you sleep tight?
im ok. tomorrow will be
a better day. can we lie now?
im running! im waltzing
through plains and fields in a
long white dress. look ma! im free! im
clean and the dear sun warms my skin!
mama do you love me?
mama why dont you speak?
let not the worms run cross your face!
let not the cold take over your place!
one of the few poems that i was actually able to put a title to.
Jealousy, anger, pride and lust,
makes up some of our sinful crust,
separating our tender insides
with a surprisingly strong hold.
such delight that is so evil,
is none too favorable,
than for the devil.
another one that i wrote sometime ago in the blog...after reading charles baudelaire.
figured since i had the fuckin extra time, could come over and write this in a lil' early. one thing i don't understand, is why people just dont know when to quit. they had fun, ive had mine, lets just stop at that shall we? if i sae i will get embarrased, i will. period. it doesnt matter what you think. been feeling rather high-strung lately - every little thing pisses me off. thing is, i can't go around showing people im pissed can i?
was forcibly discussing my dream just some minutes ago. one reason for cuttin short my pamper-myself day. i dont wanna talk about things that are, a lil' raw - dream or no dream. it just aint right. and please, it will make a difference if i sae it will - even if only to myself. and oh, it doesn't matter if i get teased or get forced to sae whoever(who cares anyway?) it was, but too much is just plain annoying. it probably...oh never mind.
this is a blog. a quiet place for me to gather my thoughts. and to perhaps share them. NOT a forum board for disscussion.
listening to: marilyn manson - speed of pain
mood: tired
doing: surfing at bored.net
want to: get out and rip someone's balls out
surfin round when i suddenly remembered a dream. how freaky/wierd/bad is it to dream you're a lesbian?
must be all the tatu stuff.
today was bad hair day. tried not to speak much(which unfortunately, i failed.) didn't speak much sense, so that'll count for something. time passed rather slowly today and i had all the time in the world to think about going home alone. it wasn't that bad a thought considering that the other option was to go home with peishi and co.
turned out i didn't have to go home alone after all. jovina was going home too, so went with her and edmund home. watched 8 mile. wasn't as good as i thought it to be. got to see eminem's butt though, so yay.
All The Things She Said
Tatu
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
All the things she said
This is not enough
I'm in serious shit, I feel totally lost
If I'm asking for help it's only because
Being with you has opened my eyes
Could I ever believe such a perfect surprise?
I keep asking myself, wondering how
I keep closing my eyes but I can't block you out
Wanna fly to a place where it's just you and me
Nobody else so we can be free
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
All the things she said
This is not enough
This is not enough
All the things she said
All the things she said
And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed
They say it's my fault but I want her so much
Wanna fly her away where the sun and rain
Come in over my face, wash away all the shame
When they stop and stare - don't worry me
Cause I'm feeling for her what she's feeling for me
I can try to pretend, I can try to forget
But it's driving me mad, going out of my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
All the things she said
This is not enough
This is not enough
All the things she said
All the things she said
Mother looking at me
Tell me what do you see?
Yes, I've lost my mind
Daddy looking at me
Will I ever be free?
Have I crossed the line?
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
Running through my head
All the things she said
All the things she said
Running through my head
Running through my head
All the things she said
This is not enough
This is not enough
All the things she said
All the things she said
so im here the yak my brains out. again.
sunday was visit the friend's house day. went to xinyin's place.was supposed to meet xiaoying at the control station's taxi stand. supposed. ended up waiting for her for more than 15 mins. apparently i was too early. see the cons of being on time. so there i was, looking out for a goldenish colored merc(which, in my memory belonged to xy's dad), so imagine my shock when a lorry/truck pulled up and someone called me. on closer inspection i realised it to be xiaoying, so i hopped on(finally). yay for me(i got to sit on a truck/lorry.). xinyin's house was de-ser-ted when we arrived. to think she warned us bout the "many" people that were gonna be there. anyways. i then proceeded to attack the food on display.
we were all pretty bored people crammed into a room, so what good ideas could we get? anyways, they decided to call people, and a bored me, to sleep. vaguely remembered them calling andy and causing him to miss his station(ha ha). found out that jess was gonna come after all.was shocked when i saw her. she looked like, erm, with lack for a better word, a child princess. guess it was the hair that made her look, er, youthful. dig her shirt, though the skirt is a lil' bit overboard(for me at least.). guess i aint much of a lacy skirts person. the day gradually got better as we progressed. played the south park versh of mario bros, which was fun by the way. had dinner at her house and played worms and puzzle bobble after that.
yesterday was visit the friend's house day(again). went to e.j's in the morn(if you consider 11.30 morn). was contemplating whether to go with xiaoying and gang to her house or to e.j's. decided on e.j's cause it was nearer. made myself at home near his foodstock when i reached. played cards and took photos(me excluded). wasn't in the mood for faking. got myself fascinated at garry's magic tricks instead. left for zhaoming's when we all finally decided there wasn't much to do at e'j's. felt a wee bit down deep inside, though why i couldn't comprehend. met jess and gang at the bus-stop. met up with elson and troop & marie and co at central. that feeling was kinda put on hold on seeing my other friends. well bless me then. i wasn't about to go to someone's house looking all glum-faced. so anyways, we arrived to a bustly(?) scene. so many people, so much food(!!!). proceeded to launch myself near his foodstock. played cards, mahjong. glad to sae that marie has now been officially included to our mahjongoholics team. played more mahjong n cards after lunch(kfc's sponsored by the kind and gracious family of zhaoming..heh).
guess it was the feeling. guess it was the thought of unfinished(and probably never gonna be finished) homework. guess it was the upcoming(dreaded) test. all that adds up to a not very happy me. anyways, was trying to find a spot where i can study(most preferably in an air-conditioned room), when i wandered to peishi's room. settled myself comfortably into a chair when suddenly the lights went off. the lights being off is good and all, but only if one aint studying. so there. so i went to the next room. zhaoxing(zhaoming's bro) was playin the ps dere. it was good and all, but the ps was simply too big a distraction. so i came upon ningzi's room. in it were 3 other very irritating people: derrick, e.j and i forgot-and-dun-care-who. dont matter anyways, cause they chased me out. after i caught them ruffling through my pouch. pissed i was. and i didn't even get to speak. so off i went in a huff. i didn't even manage to get my book back. so fuckin pissed.
went out and drowned my anger in...yep...u guessed it, more mahjong. at least i'm welcomed there. the rest of the evening passed rather uneventfully and i went home a thoughtful me. i mean, i don understand why i always do such things to myself. will it be better...if i just shut myself in my own lil' world?
All By Myself
Eric Carmen
When I was young
I never needed anyone
And making love was just for fun
Those days are gone
Living alone
I think of all the friends I’ve known
But when I dial the telephone
Nobody’s home
All by myself
Don’t wanna be, all by myself anymore
All by myself
Don’t wanna live, all by myself anymore
Hard to be sure
Sometimes I feel so insecure
And love so distant and obscure
Remains the cure
ahh...a new week. hopefully my mood'll turn around.
it rained exeptionally heavy last night, which was good. i've had just about enough of light drizzles already. as i walked home last night i felt a sudden urge to jump into puddles and throw away my umbrella(which i couldn't since the umbrella wasn't mine.). I wasn't about to get myself more sick than i was too. I walked into puddles instead(there was a considerable amount of deep puddles already.). My mood was uplifted by oh so much.
got home in time to watch the Green Mile. it's a movie adaptation from the stephen king book of the same title(again)(which i read). the book was wonderful, sad, and insightful. the movie, likewise, was amazing, interesting, and sad. i practically cried through some heavy parts of the show. the movie is basically about these few prison guards at the green mile - a keeping place for death-row convicts until they 'walk the mile' themselves - and how their lives change with the appearence of this giant of a man, john coffey(just like the drink, only spelt differently.). along the way from the arrival the the death of this great man there's percy the annoying, hate-me prison ward, 'del', the italian convict who's scared like hell of every little thing, mr jingles, a 'circus mouse', so tame and clever everybody loves it, ad the literal rotten-core in the show, billy "wild bill" wharton.
a three hour long show, yet i was glued to the seat every moment, and i can see all the critical acclaim attached to this movie. though at times difficult to understand(dam the cockney accents), there is no doubt the show is great and the actors, superb. there is, however, certain ommisions and additions and changes to the book versh, although it didn't much change the effect or the endingof the book. a must see for all who haven't caught it already. wheee.
a point of annyance yesterday was the quarrel between my uncle(yes, him again), his guitar playing, and my mom. i mean, it was in the middle of the night and he was wailing away. no doubt anyone who heard will be irritated, as did my mother and me, who were so engrossed in trying to hear what the peeps were saying(yes even she was watching). stupid quarrel that resulted in me not understanding certain parts of the show. it went like this:
my mother was trying to get my uncle's attention, then she asked him nicely to stop playing the guitar cause people will complain. then that stupd man retroted like he was about to eat us up, or that his life depended on winning that. so he said he didn;'t understand why he couldn't play as there were people who sing, maybe even more loudly than him early in the morning( a lame and dumb arguement - who ever heard of not being allowed to sing in the morning?!). which my mom pointed out. which he got embarresed at(or should be, i doubt he actually was). which he retorted again that the construction works downstairs were noisy(again, a dumb/lame arguement), which again my mother pointed out(yay!). seeing that he couldn;t win the battle no more, he left in a huff.
boo hoo, little polly's going to her mama. what a loser. he didn't come back after that(overused tatic, why don't he(she) grow up?). that adds another point to my dont-like-you factor.
oh well. long blog i see. shall refrain from winning the longest blog ever competition. tataz
xxx
