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yawns.
i have better things to do(like worryin about my pimple outbreak(that i WILL photoshop off any trace of in my photos btw dearest biatch)) than worry about you.
i guess if u wanna tell me why u're so unhappy with me then go ahead and say it.
or if u wish to correct my english then go ahead too.
i going let u edit u want or not? happy happy den okay lor i's not going to says anythings.
hahahaha.
ooooh im a spoilt little brat.
coward
n 1: a person who shows fear or timidity
2: English dramatist and actor and composer noted for his witty and sophisticated comedies (1899-1973) [syn: Coward, Noel Coward, Sir Noel Pierce Coward]
i dont think you're number 2 though. but hey if u are then okaay.
okay i just needed to add that the whore-o-scope was stolen from girl issues and its a super uber damn funny site. not for twits or what nots tho. i think you'd be pretty depressed after going there.
is it just me, or does lindsey lohan look possessed in this?
must be the exorcism of emily rose playin tricks on me.
here's my WHORE-O-SCOPE:
Powerful, dominant, and you wont shun the limelight! you are creative and energetic, you may also be too dramatic.. thats why your friends call u "action only. act chio bu chio", whatever that means. you are a great organizer and love being around ppl and action. and most of all, your hair is important to you.
from a random site.
biatch why are you trying so hard to act ang moh? you think you're very pretty issit? Please look at the mirror...
biatch: trust me i'm far from being jealous, i just think you're trying too hard, and makes it look desperate
anonymous: and pls ur eng sound too fake
anonymous: it seems like u r trying too hard
laiheng2: well, no crazy pple would admit they're crazy. they r SO jealous of u.. lol
laiheng2: u can choose nt to read if u so can't stand it, nobody's forcing u. so juz b nice & piss off. it's HER blog anw, some pple simply juz dun get it..
biatch: it's actually my first time here, just a bit surprised to see the bull comments being written here. Trust me, if you guys met her offline, you'll know what i'm talking about.
Not-a-biatch: Some is jealous.*whistles* And no I don't trust you because you're a stupid jealous prat.
am a biatch ->biatch: i dunno what you're talking about.*clueless*
biatch: lol, i'm not jealous, i'm a guy... jealous of a self centered, insensitive, boastful, crooked teeth, HUGE butt, HUGE nose, chinese trying to act ang moh immature girl? You must be kidding.
Not-a-biatch: You're a guy and you call yourself a biatch?! Are you gender confused!? I said someone I didn't say it was you, someone admits!!
oh im sorry. i didnt know that to be un-angmohish i had to speak in bad grammar like yours truly. unless you're olinda(not) or any of the people i've had on the hall of shame then im SO NOT apologetic for whatever ive said in MY blog. (and if u happen to be one of the above them im sorry :X)
so yeah, im self centered,insensitive, boastful, and what nots but since when did it become YOUR problem? u have issues my friend(not!), and i dont give 2 fucks about what you think.
i never said i was angmoh, i dont look ONE BIT like an angmoh(i never denied my very very very small eyes), im effectively bilingual(multilingual if u want to count dialect and some bits and pieces of other languages) and i dont wanna be angmoh.
tough luck man.
and oh i dont mean to brag(i really dont) but so much for "fake" english when I AM the one who's been getting a's for all my english papers to date? poor little honey dont talk facts huh? u braindead moron. polish up yr language before u even try to piss me off.
and i NEVER said i was pretty. i might think that( or i might not), but it sure hell aint none of YOUR business and people are entitled to your opinion( which i guess means yours so im gonna shut my trap on that).
no wait, do YOU even know what shutting your trap means? betcha dont, or have some seeeeeeeeeeerious problems comprehending that, judging from the way you comment.
im tryin too hard? please. i write cos i like to write, and cos my friends read what i write. if you're some random stranger who chances upon my blog then so be it. u either like what i write or dont. i dont try hard to please/entertain/annoy faceless people who think they know me behind a computer screen. if you are my friend(which i dont think you qualify as one from now on) then i might want to try to be a friend to you, and what's being a friend but to entertain and try to share laughs? apparently you have VERY little experience in that aspect to gauge for yourself. for that i forgive you.
bottomline is, i dont fucking care what i write, and if it makes you constipated somehow then i suggest you take your act elsewhere. find someone else to bother or something. DONT read my blog. on second thought, continue reading it. its people like you that make me and my friends laugh when we meet to talk about people like you.
and u better never ever let me know who you are.
or else.
did u even know singapore held its very own sexpo just 2 days ago?!
yeah, that's sex-expo if u really wanna know.
sexpo got a whole lotta people excited. all for like..15 bucks. yep you heard me. 15 bucks. oh and u had to be 18. of course.
pants were a flurry outside the sexpo hall on said day.
apparently said pants were disappointed.
well i mean, if the so-called "erotic"(a word i think is highly misused)-dances consisted of *cough* women like this:
or this:
i wouldnt be very excited as well.
but then again, some people go for such shit and i guess..judging from some people watching the show it wasnt too bad for them:
granted, dirty old men are usually more easily satisfied.
you would have thought ah-pek on the right was watching a chess match.
hall of shame
*drumrolls* its time forrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.........HALL OF SHAME. (haha im such an attention whore)
up this week is a group of individuals who caught the eye of our dearly beloved author at cafe cosmos on the 19th of november 2005 at 8(something)pm.
and here they are!
this is the very first group to be featured on the author's blog and they are so very proud to be all on it at once. says shaven bulky man in black tee, "oh yes, we do always try to be like that. its a part of our natures and we wont change being that for anything in the world. we're absolutely glad that we caught your eye and it just proves to us that our miserable existence isnt so miserable after all." indeed, they seem to lead miserable lives, playin UNO at 582 years of age at a dingy corner of some unknown bar whilst the world passes by around them.
and what, you may ask, are they so honourably on the hall of shame for?
for being the minority of the human species today who is incapable of applause! says mr hands(bodiless freak from right) "yes we are all actually members of the "hand disability club" and our hands do not have the function of clapping, appropriate time or not. but this is never a problem for us, for we are still able to hold our UNO cards well." well said, mr president! sobs miss engrossed at a corner over there, "i just didnt expect that being such an antisocial freak would bring me honour and glory! i..im just so proud to be ill mannered and oblivious to the wonderful music around me and play UNO like its the single most important thing in my pathetic little life! i..i..i....(at this point interviewee breaks down in a torrent of dirty, salty little tears).
*UNO card makers: i do not mean any harm.*
yesterday was spent with people who really do light up my life.
firstly its you. i dont think i can ever survive without you.
and then there's all of you.
went to the new library yesterday. all i can say of the 14-storey library is... well i didnt know there were so many interesting activities to be done there. HA. and i love the toilets. :x
and then, being bored people that we were(okay so i am the bored one who forced her to do it), we decided to do this:
and then it was a hurried dinner, then on to cafe cosmos. i was DUPED into believing i was to have dessert there. (okay lar to be honest i did in the end but it was at ripples and we had beer and ice cream)
i was SO EXCITED, cause.....
xy n mel (and random dude) were to be performing there.
it was a tiny squashed up place in the middle of nowhere, but it was pretty cool.
but i was so uberly irritated by SOME PEOPLE(refer to this week's hall of shame). GRR. some people just have "annoying" stamped onto their faces.
but who cares about them.
so right after them were this duo. whose lead singer looked SO like yy's little sister:
okay tt was a shitty shot but ppl were hovering! and they did sound pretty good too.
(we were tryin to look like rock stars.)
and this:
oh well. all in a day's work.
this is fcking hilarious. haha.
the cold night made the space between you and i a great divide. it is the valley of death - perish all ye who venture. our words get echoed and eventually lost in the yawning void. its emptiness is as black as our souls, burnt beyond repair. the cold night made frosty by your biting words. each breath we utter is an icicle aimed straight for the hearts; we are a cavern full of icicles, its deadly points glittering in the darkness, each hanging precariously over our heads ready to fall and strike us down, strike us dead.
in the middle of the stone cold night - the hour of the dead - you and i are slowly dying.
until that one touch that brings us back to life, like jesus from the dead.
erm. is that like..for easy access or something?
(FYI: i'm not lookin at porn u sick fucks. its called online lingerie shopping.)
other than being a little weirded out looking at this chap's face?
its great.
almost like the original if i should say so myself. :X
kudos to him
check it out here.
"the author of this blog is looking for candidates to star in her newly added section of "losers anonymous". auditions are not necessary and shortlisted candidates will be feature on the hall of shame(aka losers anonymous) on a weekly basis. entries are based on a first come first served basis. interested applicants, please send a picture of yourself at what u think is your very best(eg leopard print thong clad 40 year olds, decapitated scrawny bodies of not so tanned skin, fat balding wankers with dick in hand, burger in the other...) to her email or try to add yourself as a friend on her friendster/myspace account. thank you for your kind attention."
the hall of shame
i think, with the rate weirdos attract themselves to me, i can start a like weekly hall of shame or something.
you know, just for entertainment purposes. (feelings are not meant to be hurt.)
this week's singapore's very own! JURONG-WEST guy....*drumrolls* MR LIBERAL.
mr liberal is kinda shy(ala the headless shot)(but apparently not THAT shy to not advertise himself), but he promises a fulfiling package! standing at a seemingly tall statuette mr liberal likes working out(hence the abs), taking naked pictures of himself and posting it all over the net. he says it stems from his innate wish to care and share with the entire world. "i want nothing other than world peace!*sniffles*". he doesnt like going out very much(hence, the not so tanned skin), but likes wanking at home in front of the com to pictures of ladies he finds on myspace. "i think friends are very important and i would like to make friends with any women and especially women who want to see my package."
interested parties please contact him.
math was a bitch.
i hope the bitch setter of the fucking math paper 2 rots all the way at cambridge.
on to other things.
marilyn monroe is now believed to might have died from enema poisoning. which is like.. EWWW anyone?
for anybody who doesnt know what it is( you shouldnt too, for your sanity).dont click here
oh well. i suppose it's a really healthy process, albeit very a teeny weeny gross.
whenever i feel constipated i'd be sure to run on down to the site. im sure i'll feel like shittin all over again.
on to other (not so pleasant (for me)) things.
my goddess/latest obsession/queen rebecca tan
was seen with that fishball(refer to inserted picture/previous posts for more info)
and they did THIS!
:( *sobs*
oh well. at least that exclamation mark was in place.
for people who (misguidedly) read this overly rated blogger's blog, you'll probably know i stole the pics from her. HEH.
ahh. not as if she'd know anyway. UNLESS I HAVE SNITCH FRIENDS. (shame on you)
and i just gotta say..i know catwoman is sexy and all( believe me, catwoman now = sexy) with the black leather skimpy outfit, but WTF WAS OLI WEARING?! omg. seriously girl, its only halloween. not "lets degrade ourselves down to loserdom never to come back again" day. ok not as if she had anything to degrade in the first place. (ok i know im mean and if there's this teeeeeeeeeeeny weeeeeeeeeny chance that you might be reading this in person then im sorry. :X)
ok that's it. im done with ranting(for now).
so sue me. (ok i meant that figuritively, please dont actually do that)
this, is cookie.
she wants me to introduce her best friend to you.
this..is the girl she cant live without
(nope its not me)
- the eyeless, shirtless COW.
yes cookie did it to her.
now every morning when i wake up, without fail(afternoon if u want to be politically correct) cookie will drag COW all the way from wherever COW was at the moment and force me to play with it. or rather, force me to play with her by stuffing the (very) smelly COW onto my hands/laps/legs/anywhere shovable.
now as u can see, playing involves a lot of biting and a lot of tugging.
its no wonder how COW ended up like that.
after an indefinte LONG amount of time(when ive FINALLY decided not to entertain the whims of my very bored dog), she'll most probably trot off to a corner, with COW in mouth. and continue playing with it.
and that means licking and gnawing on it even more.
finally, at the end of the day..just like any human being who cannot sleep without having their favorite bolster/bear/pillow tucked under arm, cookie drags COW into her bed. without fail.
AWWWWW. aint that cute?
CLICK ME!
i leave you now. wish me luck.
oh tts probably how i sound like if i were to sing. HA.
i dont know what's wrong with my fuckin blog but well i dont have time to fix it. enjoy the blah template for the mo. oh well its time i changed my skin anyways.
yawns.
NEXT.
not long more now. 2 fuckin days.
oh great. just great.
leave me to wallow in my own misery.
like a rabid dog biting at the hand that feeds it.
that's what im feeling now.
a fucking rabid dog - drool dripping from my mouth, bloodshot, hungry eyes.
u fear me. you dont understand me. you cant do nothing to help me.
u watch every move i make.
my tensed limbs, poised for action.
blinded by the purple haze i see nothing. i bite nothing. i bite dust. i bite a thing or two but i cant discern what i chew, what i gnaw.
im a fucking rabig dog and u better stay away from me if u know what's good for you.
i am so absolutely amused by the uncanny resemblance between my new best friend salad fingers and my existing best friend, xinyin. oh well.. u said it yourself!
in the spirit of halloween here's a short lil (weird) cartoon of salad fingers.
enjoy(if you're into these kinda things)
Mark your confessions:
[x ] I'm afraid of the quiet.
[ ] I am really ticklish.
[ ] I'm afraid of the dark.
[ ] I'm afraid of facing my back to open doors at night.
[ ] I am homosexual.
[ ] I believe in true love.
[ ] I've ran away from home.
[ ] I listen to political music.
[ ] I collect comic books.
[x] I shut others out when I'm sad.
[x] I stayed out all night.
[ ] I open up to others easily.
[x] I am keeping a secret from the world.
[x] I watch the news, some of the time.
[ ] I own over 5 rap CDs.
[ ] I love Disney movies.
[x ] I am a sucker for green eyes.
[ ] I don't kill bugs.
[x] I curse often.
[ ] I have (had) "x"s in my screen name. ah?
[x] I've slipped and fell in public.
[ ] I've slipped out a "lol" in a real
conversation.
[ ] I love Spam.
[ ] I bake well.
[ ] I have worn pajamas to class.
[ ] I have owned something from Abercrombie.
[ ] I have a job.
[x] Talked on a phone for 5+ hours.
[ ] I love Dr. Phil
[x] I like someone.
[x ] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
[x] I am self-conscious.
[x] I love to laugh.
[x] I have tried alcohol.
[ x] I drink alcohol on a regular basis.
[x] I have tried a cigarette.
[ ] I have smoked a pack in one day.
[ x] I loved Lord of the Flies.
[x ] I have cough drops when I'm not sick.
[ ] I can't swallow pills. XY! tt refers to YOU.haha
[x] I have a few scars.
[x] I've been out of this country.
[ ] I can't sleep if there is a spider in the room. as long as they dont crawl on me im fine.
[x] I love chocolate. LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVES
[ ] I bite my nails.
[ ] I am not comfortable with being me.
[x] I play computer games when I'm bored.
[ ] Gotten lost in the city.
[x ] Thought of suicide before.
[ ] Seen a shooting star.
[ ] Had a serious surgery.
[ ] Gone out in public in your pajamas.
[x ] Have kissed a stranger.
[ x] Hugged a stranger.
[ ] Been in a bloody fist fight with someone of the same sex.
[ ] Been in a fist fight.
[ ] Been arrested.
[x] Laughed and had some type of beverage come out of your nose.
[x] Pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
[ ] Made out in an elevator.
[x ] Swore at your parents.
[ ] Kicked a guy where it hurts on purpose.
[ ] Been skydiving.
[ ] Been bungee jumping.
[x] Gotten stitches. those u get when u laugh/run too hard?
[ ] Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
[x] Bitten someone.
[ ] Been to Niagara Falls.
[ ] Gotten the chicken pox.
[ ] Crashed into a car.
[xxxxxxxx ] going to Australia.
[x] Ridden in a taxi.
[x ] Shoplifted.
[ ] Been fired.
[x] Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back.
[x] Stole something from your job.
[ ] Gone on a blind date.
[x] Had a crush on a teacher/coach.
[ ] Celebrated Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
[ ] Been to Europe.
[ ] Slept with a co-worker.
[ ] Been married.
[ ] Gotten divorced.
[x] Saw someone/something dying.
[ ] Driven over 400 miles in one day.
[ ] Been to Canada.
[x] Been on a Plane.
[ ] Seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
[ ] Thrown up in a bar.
[x] Eaten sushi.
[ ] Been snowboarding.
[ ] Been skiing.
[x] Been ice skating.
[x] Cried in public
[x ] Walked purposely into traffic with your eyes closed. with eyes open can?
[x] Liked someone even though you knew you shouldn't have.
[x] Thought of someone almost 24/7
[x ] Hates the world HAHA.
